I was so nervous to go to my appointment in January and tell my obgyn that I was failing at something so simple as making a baby. I cam armed with charts and questions. Although it had not been 12 calendar months it had been 12 cycles, and already felt like an eternity.
I sat there on the crinkly table waiting for my doctor to come in. We talked about the normalcy of my cycles and my leutal phase. She seriously thought something was wrong with my hubby since it had been longer since he had a child.
We decided to do a semen analysis, HSG (which is where they check your tubes and uterus for any abnormalities), and progesterone blood work done 7 days after ovulation. If everything came back fine we would start clomid. I would be able to do 3 rounds of clomid with my obgyn each cycle checking my progesterone level to insure that I had indeed ovulated. If we were not pregnant after 3 cycles I would then have to move to the RE.
So the testing began. First progesterone check came back perfect, I was ovulating just fine on my own.
Hubby’s semen analysis was perfect, ruling him out as the problem.
The HSG came back perfect as well.
So we started 50mg of clomid on CD5-9. Then we had a schedule on which to have sex. This was March, the month of our anniversary. I thought the timing was perfect. And it was. I got a positive hpt on 15dpo. Two days later AF came. Another CP, another failure.
I picked myself up and started the next clomid cycle. 50mg CD3-7. April 2013 ended in a BFN.
The next cycle we decided it was time to head to the RE. My husband agreed and we made a consultation. We met with Dr. Griffith, he was amazing and gave me hope again. He said we needed to do CD 3 testing which includes: FSH, AMH, LH, and E2. As well as we could do optional genetic testing, which my husband wanted to do. We would then go in for a baseline ultrasounds to check AFC. Then depending on the results we could proceed.
I went and got 3 vials of blood drawn of CD3 and 17 vials of blood drawn for genetic screening. The baseline ultrasound showed an AFC of 2 which is incredibly low. This was our first red flag. We decided to proceed with 100mg of Clomid and IUI. But as the results came in things quickly changed. My FSH: 5.88, AMH: .64, LH: 4.97, E2: 72.1. What all of this means is my E2 was high which was falsely suppressing my FSH to look normal and my AMH was incredibly too low for my age. All of that combined with my AFC means I have diminished ovarian reserve. Meaning I have very few eggs left. The IUI cycle was cancelled and my husband and I were left to contemplate what was next.
At this point I couldn’t take it anymore, I needed a break. My husband needed a break. We were just drained emotionally. And it felt like we were only ever having sex to make a baby. I also felt completely broken.
We went on about our life and in June we got a surprise positive on an hpt. I told my husband and we were so happy! For three days that is. And then just like before AF showed. This made CP #4. But this time something was different. This time something broke inside me. I was very sad and had to pick myself up off the floor. My husband though, he was amazing. He decided we needed to go back to the RE and move onto the next step. He had gotten excited for the baby and realized he was ready.